That is the same problem I had in my most stressful position.
I was working for a consulting company:
The first project I worked on was great, some of the most enjoyable work I've done at a company.
Then the second project came (same company, same client). Things weren't going so well, so I started talking about the problems that everyone was having, and started talking about how we could fix the problems...
... and that's when the real problem revealed itself. The project manager on the client-side was secretly trying to replace my consulting company with another consulting company (where he had friends). However, my consulting company had ties with higher management at the client company, and my consulting company didn't want to abandon the work, because they wanted the money, of course.
In the end, it was revealed that our team of programmers was surrounded on all sides by people that didn't care about solving the same problem, they only cared about the political games.
It was extremely stressful. I got shingles, and was diagnosed with celiac disease in the same week. It's hard to say for sure, but I think the celiac disease was activated by the stress--I still have it to this day obviously.
My advice to others:
(1) Identify the problem (2) Communicate with the people that are needed to fix the problem (3) Work towards fixing the problem
If at any point communication breaks down, or you realize management is not trying to solve the same problems you are trying to solve, then you need to GTFO.
As a consultant there's no point in being so personally involved in the project outcome that you let it impact your health. Follow management orders, do the best work you can, and let the chips fall where they may. Whether the project succeeds or fails, you'll get paid either way and eventually you'll get reassigned to another client.
"the owner instructed everyone not to talk to me, I found out years later".
The guy was a sociopathic narcissist. I have been in similar situations a couple of times, thankfully not for too long.
The way I knew it wasn't a me problem, was that they later turned on other people in even more damaging and toxic ways. Also I have had a long career in many different environments where I was very appreciated.
I think they felt threatened by me first because I was quietly confident and independent minded. Not sure though.
If you come into an environment with a narcissistic and charismatic leader but you are an independent thinker, watch out...,
if it was a me problem then they would not have let the then president of the company go for working with me
I was not the one with communication problems but people are really good at blaming me for their own problems